WLKM Radio 95.9 FM
My wife has suggested that I clean up my office. It seems she came in there yesterday and couldn’t find her way out. This prompted me to clear out a couple file folders filled with useless information. I thought you readers might either learn something from them or at least chuckle a little.
Here are some strange but true facts:
— 40% of McDonald’s profits come from the sales of Happy Meals.
— 315 entries in Webster’s 1996 Dictionary were misspelled.
— On the average, 12 newborns will be given to the wrong parents daily.
— Chocolate kills dogs. True, chocolate affects a dog’s heart and nervous system. A few ounces is enough to kill a small sized dog.
— The original name for the butterfly was “flutterby”.
This Thursday, March 20, is the first day of Spring. There is still a chance of getting some snow. After all, this is Michigan.
The United States Armed Forces operates very efficiently, thanks to the many training manuals that are readily available. Much wisdom can be had by reading them on a regular basis.
— “If the enemy is in range, so are you.” ~ Infantry Journal
— “It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.” ~ Air Force Manual–
— “Whoever said that the pen is mightier than the sword, obviously never encountered automatic weapons.” ~ General Douglas MacArthur
— “Tracers work both ways.” ~ Army Ordnance Manual
— “Five second fuses last about three seconds.” ~ Infantry Journal
If you enjoy fish, but are not a fisherman, here’s something to checkout. The Fraternal Order of Eagles #2303 will host a Walleye Dinner and Silent Auction this next Saturday, March 22, from 5 until 8 PM. The fundraiser will benefit Three Rivers Area Mentoring (TRAM) Youth Programming. The cost is $18 per person and the menu includes Walleye or Chicken Tenders, Hush Puppies, Cole Slaw, French Fries, and a cookie. The Eagles is located at 715 East Hoffman, in Three Rivers. Tickets will be available at the door, or you may purchase them at Lowry’s Books in downtown Three Rivers. For more information, phone (269)278-8726.
Oxymorons are fascinating. Here are some:
— Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?
— Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?
— Why does “slow down” and “slow up” mean the same thing?
— Why do tug boats push their barges?
— Why are they called “stands” when they are made for sitting?
— Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?
See you Out and About!
Submitted by Norm Stutesman
